Day 8: The Vampire Diaries

Yes, I am That Mom.  I am the mother of a biter.  The good news is that he’s still young enough that it’s acceptable.  And fixable.  The bad news is that for now, I am The Mother of That Kid Who Keeps Biting Everyone in Daycare.

The first incident report or two I freaked out and googled the depths of “why, why, why, and how to stop it, and by god, make him stop.”  By the 7th, I just laughed it off and said the other kid probably deserved it.

On one particular occasion, my ex was picking him up from daycare and the father of the bitee was reading HIS incident report about his child being bitten and said to the teacher, “Who is this kid doing all the biting??”  My ex just grabbed our little vampire, ducked and bailed.  Figures.  That’s what he’s best at.  But I won’t go into that here.

I would have stopped right then and there and said, “Hey, asshole.  It’s my kid who bit your kid.  How do you think I feel?  Not that this is all about me.  But maybe think about what YOUR kid did to provoke the bite.”  I’d be all up in his face Dirty Harry-style and well, not really.  But in my head I was.  And it wasn’t pretty.  I mean, I was pretty, but the scene was just ugly.  For him.

The sweetest justice was the incident report that came home two weeks ago stating that my little vampire was the unfortunate recipient of a bite from a classmate.  I laughed and am fairly sure I posted it on Facebook.

For the most part he’s stopped biting at school, or at least has figured out how to do it when the teacher isn’t looking.  Nowadays he generally saves his strikes for his sister (who usually deserves it) and inanimate objects.  Just the other day, I saw him bite his tricycle, his “purse,” and his jammies.

For the record, I’m pretty confident I’m also The Mother Who is Always Late Getting Her Kid to School and The Mother Who Never RSVPs For Your Kid’s Party and The Mother Who Never Volunteers in the Classroom.  I’ve never been more proud.

In honor of NaBloPoMo.


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