Merci, Oui?

So I am shampooing the other day and while reading the shampoo bottle like I had all the time in the world, I noticed that almost every American bath or beauty product these days has the label in English and in French. What is that about? I am riddled with questions and statements about this.

  1. Do we egotistical Americans really think that people in France are going to be reading the side of a bottle of Herbal Essences and be impressed?
  2. It’s ironic, because the country that seemingly hates us the most is the very country we are trying to woo with our shampoo. We’re like a desperate girlfriend drinking and dialing. Too little too late, if you know what I mean.
  3. Or, are companies just doing that so that Betty in Hard Luck, Missouri will think she’s buying something fancy from France?
  4. Let’s just pretend that the myth about European hygiene is true. The French hardly shower, so the effort is sort of lost on them, right?
  5. My package of toilet paper has English and Spanish. But no French. Hmmm….now I’m confused. Is that a diss? To someone? Is anyone uncomfortable here?
  6. Then I just figured it’s for the Canadians.
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